Season 5
Episodes • 2007

1. Large Birds, Spiders and Mom
20 minJake is getting ready to start a new school as he graduates to Junior High. Alan and Charlie take him school shopping and find themselves in trouble.
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2. Media Room Slash Dungeon
22 minCharlie acts strange after spending an evening with his mother, and a woman Alan slept with behaves oddly the next morning.
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3. Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo
21 minAlan convinces Charlie that he needs to date more respectable women and sets him up with a judge. The two double date and their waitress happens to be one of Charlie’s ex-girlfriends. Charlie's date backfires the following morning, when he ends up in court in front of the judge.
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4. City of Great Racks
22 minCharlie and Linda get closer to consummating their relationship, but Charlie has trouble focusing when he begins to see Rose's face everywhere he turns.
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5. Putting Swim Fins on a Cat
22 minCharlie has to come up with ways to keep his girlfriend's 4-year-old amused; Alan becomes a test subject.
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6. Help Daddy Find His Toenail
21 minCharlie's girlfriend is embrassed to go out in public with him. Meanwhile, Jake sneaks out to attend a concert.
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7. The Leather Gear Is in the Guest Room
20 minAfter Alan and Charlie have a fight about Alan's role in the house. Alan packs Jake up and moves in with his mother.
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8. Is There a Mrs. Waffles?
20 minCharlie writes a children’s song and finds success as Charlie Waffles. The children love him and the mothers seem to as well. Charlie's new found fame irritates Alan.
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9. Shoes, Hats, Pickle Jar Lids
20 minCharlie fights his attraction for Teddy's daughter.
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10. Kinda Like Necrophilia
22 minAlan finds out that Charlie stole his girlfriend and works on a plan to get back at Charlie, even though this happened when they were in high school.
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11. Meander to Your Dander
22 minWhen Alan finds himself wanting to break up with a woman, Charlie offers his expertise.
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12. A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh
22 minRose returns from England, and plays nurse rather oddly for an ill Charlie.
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13. The Soil Is Moist
20 minAlan finds out some surprising information about Judith's sex life when he decides to go on a date with one of her friends.
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14. Winky-Dink Time
22 minCharlie double-dates with Jake and fixes Alan up with a hooker.
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15. Rough Night in Hump Junction
21 minAlan feels Charlie is unable to control his womanizing ways.
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16. Look At Me Mommy, I'm Pretty
22 minAlan makes wedding plans for Evelyn and Teddy, while Charlie figures out how to get more acquainted with his future step-sister.
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18. If My Hole Could Talk
21 minCharlie's attracted to an older self-help author. Alan and Jake clash over a project for school.
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19. Waiting for the Right Snapper
22 minWhen Charlie meets Angie's soon to be daughter-in-law, he realizes it's not for the first time.
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