Season 5
Episodes • 2002

1. Arthur, Spooner
25 minHolly asks Doug if she can get a raise for walking Arthur, while Carrie gets a promotion.
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2. Window Pain
25 minFeeling inferior to, and looked down upon by, the new neighbors, Carrie tries to make a good impression, but Doug couldn't care less. Meanwhile, Arthur tries to use Spence for free subway rides.
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3. Holy Mackerel
25 minDoug and Carrie start going to church after an uncomfortable encounter with their priest and when Carrie's prayer for a raise is answered, she gets a little carried away and starts praying for such trivial matters as a shoe sale.
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4. Kirbed Enthusiasm
25 minDeacon asks Doug to help him coach his 8-year-old son's football team and the boy challenges Doug to try out for a semi-pro team, but Carrie isn't thrilled with the idea until she sees an interesting photo of him.
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5. Mammary Lane
25 minDoug's bowling team prepares for a tournament, while Carrie agrees to babysit Mr. Kaplan's son, in hopes of furthering her career. But when Doug throws out a mercy flirt and Carrie runs into an awkward set of hands, all goes downhill.
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6. Business Affairs
25 minDoug stops by Carrie's office and is introduced to her work-husband Curt. Although Carrie assures him that he has nothing to worry about since Curt is gay, Doug is threatened by just how close the two are.
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7. Flame Resistant
25 minCarrie meets Doug's ex-girlfriend Margy and is surprised to learn that Margy is still very close with Doug's mother.
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8. Flash Photography
25 minAt a wedding, Doug takes a naughty picture with a disposable camera supplied by the bride and groom. After letting Danny take the blame, and after confessing to a priest, he has the dreaded task of coming forward with the truth.
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9. Connect Four
25 minCarrie wins four company seats to Knicks games, but insists on taking a couple over Doug's friends. Meanwhile, Arthur digs himself a hole by pretending he can "fix" parking tickets.
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10. Loaner Car
25 minDoug loans Carrie to Deacon to help prepare Thanksgiving dinner. When Deacon ditches her for Holly's services, his web of lies soon gets out of control. Trying to cover it up, Doug continues to dig a hole for himself.
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11. Mentalo Case
25 minA toy from their childhood leads to a rift between Deacon and Doug. Meanwhile, Carrie tries to give her father a great Christmas gift, but this proves hard to do when everyone thinks of the wrong gifts they are receiving, altering their original gift choices.
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12. Jung Frankenstein
25 minCarrie thinks Doug needs professional help to control his excessive eating habits, so she persuades him to see a therapist. When Carrie sees Doug's great inprovements, she asks the therapist to work on Doug's other issues. Meanwhile, Arthur believes he's addicted to nasal spray and fights to stay off of it.
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13. Attention Deficit
25 minDoug becomes obsessed with his own Super Bowl party after learning that many of his friends will be attending a party thrown by a new co-worker. While Doug is focused on winning back as many guests as possible, Carrie complains that Doug doesn't think about her enough during the day. Problems arise when Doug tries to throw the ultimate Super Bowl party and prove to Carrie he's an attentive husband.
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14. Prints Charming
25 minDoug and Carrie photos get mixed up with another couples. When Doug and Carrie look at the other couples photos, they find out that their lives aren't as good as the others, so they try to do what are seen in the photos. Arthur's new cellphone is in no use when no one calls him.
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15. Animal Attraction
25 minDoug cannot spend time with Carrie on Valentine's Day, because he has to deliver penguins, with Deacon, from one zoo to another. Meanwhile, Carrie and Holly go out, with Carrie giving Holly tips to land a man.
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16. Golden Moldy
25 minDoug and Carrie are having fun on their vacation with their neighbors in St. Croix, but once Arthur calls with a quote on the current mold problem in the house, all is not so fun.
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17. S'Poor House
25 minThe mold problem in the Heffernan household grows and Doug and Carrie find out to fix the problem will cost them $12,000! Doug, with his tail between his legs, goes to his father to ask for the money, but hits a wall when he wants to know why he and Carrie don't have it in the bank.
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18. Steve Moscow
25 minDoug and Carrie try to get the Russian workers to repair their house, by going to extreme lengths of giving them vodka.
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19. Cowardly Lyin'
25 minCarrie gets tickets to an opera but Doug doesn't want to go so he has Deacon help him lie to get out of it. Carrie catches him in the lie which prompts Doug to confess to a series of lies he's been hiding.
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20. Driving Reign
25 minDanny asks Doug for a letter of recommendation at IPS so he can move up to being a driver like Doug. Since this idea does not appeal to Doug, Carrie decides she will write the letter and have Doug sign it.
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21. Clothes Encounter
25 minCarrie can't stop buying expensive clothes, and then returning them within a few days. Spence's new girlfriend is afraid of his dog and tells him to decide who he wants, the dog or her.
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22. Queens'bro Bridge
25 minArthur and his half-brother Skitch are reunited when Doug sets it up for them to meet again at the tollbooth Skitch works at on the freeway. When Doug realizes they own a house together, he sees the possibility of getting his basement back and he and Carrie having some personal time.
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23. Dog Shelter
25 minCarrie learns from Janet that Doug had a dog when he was 11, that they still have today, and Doug is 38! Janet admits to Carrie that the dog died, and they replaced it without Doug knowing.
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24. Taste Buds
25 minSince Doug never gets what he wants from Carrie, he uses Arthur to ask Carrie for them, so he gets what he wants. Meanwhile, Spence is first on line to see a new movie.
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25. Bed Spread
25 minAfter Doug breaks their bed, Doug and Carrie find temporarily having separate beds is improving their marriage. Arthur discovers that their sweet neighbor, Lou Ferrigno, is actually quite a gossip.
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